PROSPECT OF DEATH - a "grave"ly serious matter!!!

On this day, when we are welcoming the new year - according to the Hindu calender, writing about death seems ironical enough. The idea behind it is if you respect death, it will respect you and stay away from you. It is like bribing death to save yourself from it. It is to celebrate the spirit of life!!!!!

I had a dream one of these days:

All of a sudden, I die!! Nobody knows why. Nobody knows how. Neither do I. And, as per Hindu mythology, YAMAKINKARAS - the servants of Yama, the God of Death, come to chain my soul and take it away. I struggle. I struggle hard. Yet, I can not free myself from them. I feel life ebbing away!!

That's when I woke up with  a start - I found myself sweating. I threw away my blanket and switched on the fan. Ah!! What a relief it was to find myself alive, again!! It had not been a dream - but a nightmare!!! That was when thoughts started flowing - for after a nightmare, you can seldom sleep well that night. I questioned myself what it would be to die. Well, nobody knows - those alive don't know. Those dead cannot return to tell how it is!!

At this point, I would like to narrate an incident that is said to have taken place in the family circle years ago:

There was this person who was suffering from illness. That person's health deteriorated to the the maximum and everybody - including the doctors - gave up hope! That person was shifted to another hospital. The patient was in coma. The doctors declared dead. And all of a sudden, that person stirred. There still was life in that person. It was declared nothing short of a miracle!! And when others asked what it felt like, that person said " I had been to hell!! I saw Yama. He told that since I had "accounts" to clear still on earth, I was not fit to be dead so soon. He sent me back to earth."

We can never verify the authenticity of what that person told - for that person is no longer alive. Was it the effect of the stories heard during that person's life that made them to see YAMA'S DARBAR? Perhaps it was. Or is it real that there exists a Yama, the accountant with his assistant, Chitragupta? We never know.

The word death seems very interesting and has an air of mystery around it - for nobody knows what is beyond death, do we?

And many times we "feel" we missed death by a whisker - whether or not we were close to death. Recently, my friends and I went to WONDER LA, one of the biggest and most popular amusement parks. And as we sat through the dry rides - I took part only in a countable few, not all - I felt life moving out of my body. I knew nothing would happen. Yet, the fear of something happening, the fear of death overtook my enthusiasm. I don't feel embarassed or ashamed to say that I was scared then. It is just that I love to live and I love life a lot!! "Is it wrong to love life?" is my question to those who call me a coward. Even though I know nothing happens in these amusement parks, for they would have taken the measures beforehand, I don't want to risk my life for a ride which I dont feel comfortable with.

Though people may say "I dont care for death. I am ready to face it", there will always be fear in their heart, which seems to be hidden beneath a layer of superficial bravery. Infact, it is only the soldiers who are the real bravehearts. Hats off to them!!

Even though I love life, I find myself sometimes being too philosophical and thinking that death is an inevitabilty; I am powerless; let me face it even if it consumes me right now. I know that is not me - for, as I have said, I love my life.

At this moment, I again feel philosophical. I find myself saying "Ah! It does'nt matter even if I die. I have seen India lifting the World Cup. What else does one require??!!" I deserve a tight slap off myself! I will give it!!

OF MUSIC – Once Upon a Time……

This is one of my older creations, which fortunately or unfortunately couldn't be posted on my blog for so many days.


In the days of yore, in a village yonder

A boy lived, who thought “Music – a wonder!”

It was his deepest passion that to learn music.

Music was his love; and he – lovesick.

His search went on and on

He could not find a Master.

But one day, he heard a divine raga

His heart began beating faster.

There stood a hill; on top of it – a cave.

To a mystic magician of music, shelter it gave.

Sat crosslegged, singing, with eyes closed did he

Emanating from his throat,

The raga was as enchanting as it could be.

The boy came to the cave,

Running up the hill.

Listening to this maestro’s music –

It gave him such a thrill!

Falling to your feet, I beg you oh Master!

From you, I want to learn to sing.

I do not come here alone, Master.

With me, immense passion I bring!

Impressed with the boy’s devotion,

The Master took the boy to train.

In his eyes, the Master saw passion,

An ocean of knowledge did the boy gain.

Years passed; The boy learnt to sing.

Under the Master, his imagination grew wing.

In the light of the Master, the boy’s future shone bright.

But fate took an evil turn – as evil as it might!

“My child, I will teach you a raga –

Oh! ‘Tis the favourite of mine.

Sung with passion, as in you,

Oh! It will be divine!

I shall teach you Amrutavarshini –

The raga that will bring rain.

When sung from the heart, as you sing,

It will vanquish all your pain.”

Unfortunately, the Boy who sang ragas from his heart,

Could not render Varshini.

Banished was he from the Master’s sight.

Fate had played it’s part.

By then, both the Master and the disciple had become famous in the villages around. The news of the disciple’s banishing spread like wildfire. They came to the cave to ask the Master to take back his words and said that they would search for him. But the Master remained unmoved.

Years passed; The disciple practiced.

He made Varshini his forte.

A month later, the Master died.

The village was struck with drought.

The people searched for the disciple.

But he was nowhere to be seen.

On one fateful night, he came to the cave –

The cave where his Master had been.

Having known of his Master’s death,

The disciple was overcome with grief.

He mourned for a while, he cried

And then, he began to sing.

People rushed on hearing his voice

Amruthavarshini he rendered.

Long before he completed the aalaap,

The rain-god had thundered!!!!!

With his beautiful singing, the disciple brought rain to the drought-struck village. Unfortunately, his Master, whose favorite was Amruthavarshini, remained only in the heart of his disciple, not in the physical world.

LOST AND FOUND..........

Before writing this post, I made a search on the net as to see if there was any famous book or play with the same title. Not to my surprise, there was one book and a play - both for kids. Let me make it clear that this post has got nothing to do with either of them.

My mind reels back to someday 8 years ago......I was in 2nd std.....That day, I lost my pencil box. I wasn't mature enough then(which means I am mature now) to understand that losing something was a sign of irresponsible behaviour and was a "punishable offence". I coolly went to my mother and asked her to acoompany me to the nearest stationery store(the reason being I was not a grown up then to handle transactions on my own or to cross roads alone).

Mother: Why? What do you want to buy?
Me: I have lost my pencil box. I need to do my homework. So I need to get my pencil box, pencil, eraser, scale, sharpener....everything. Please come with me, mother.

That enraged my mother. My being so cool even after informing her - without a bit of shame and sorry - added fuel to the fire!! I received a good round of blasting. Later in the evening when my father returned home, I was met with a second round. My brother chuckling when I was being scolded hurt my "ego". I decided to walk out of the house. I did go away, crying. But where did I go? I have mentioned that i wasn't grown-up enough to cross roads alone. I ended up standing in front of a provision store 50 metres away from my house, on the same lane, making a public expression of my grief and sorrow.. My father waited for a good ten minutes - he knew I would not dare to go anywhere - and then came to take me back home(this incident circulated like wildfire in the family circle and everybody had a good laugh, to my embarassment).
The mext day, I went to school only to find my box at my desk. I had left it there the previous day, in a hurry to run home. My box was lost and found.

1 year ago.....An inter-school competition......I was to participate in 4 events(never mind which they were - one of them was a drama). I was in high spirits - participating in 4 events I wanted to win atleast one prize for my school. The events were spread over two days. The first day, I lost both the events. I wasn't hoping to win in both of them either. My hopes and energies were foussed on the drama. Complete with costumes and props, we entered the stage. We performed well - exceedingly well. Despite two members coming on stage out of cue, we managed it with presence of mind. Our expectations of winning were high. Even the audience felt the same. We also planned for a party after the results - such was our hope!! The result were declared - all our hopes were in vain - all our dreams came crashing down to earth!! We had lost. I had lost - for I was the one who requested the teachers to let us participate in the drama. And I had also lost the 4th event. For once, I had lost in all the competitions I had participated in. My confidence took a beating and I felt myself  being trampled!! It took me another to wins at different events to regain, to find what I had lost - my confidence and my character.

Just 2 days ago....Somebody hacked my id. I felt my limbs chopped off. I couldn't believe my id was hacked!! Yet that was the reality was that it had been hacked. I had to follow a long procedure of filling a form, sending it to the authorities and receiving a mail from them before regaining my id. To the long list of things I lost and found, I added a valuable thing - my email id!!!!!!!!!!
 

WHERE THE END MARKS THE BEGINNING............

As I sit here writing, my mind goes back in time - a week or so - refresh the memories that will always stay fresh in my mind: our final days in school. Moving backwards in time is quite tough. But the once you are into the world of your fnd memories, I think it is worth the difficulty.

That day, we decided to play our last cricket match - our class and the adjoining class. The game reached a sort of an anti-climax even before it started - lack of space. Yet, it could not hamper our spirit to play one final game before leaving school. We are old rivals(on-field only) - the rivalry is 7 years old. And as if to pacify our hearts burning with that fire of revenge and to be declared a champion, the match ended in a tie - even in the super-over. That inspired me to write this post - the beginning of the end.

And the week that followed was quite emotional and the "floodgates" opened - it was our last week in school(and the preparatory marks were also given).With slambooks, hugs, photo sessions and tears, it could have made anybody sentimental. Afterall, we had spent 12 long years in school - having shared almost everything: our secrets, our likes and dislikes, punishments and even bunking classes, sometimes. Those 12 years had built a strong sense of unity and oneness amongst us - even when one was caught doing wrong, we stood by him and saw to it he came out unscathed.

That week saw even quite a few teachers getting emotional. Afterall, they had nurtured us for so long. We had bid adieu to all our familiar haunts and fellows and our very dear school to embark on a voyage where still uncertainty shrouds many of us. A voyage that will take us far - away from all our familiar-till-now places.
I only hope we all are successful on our voyage(s).

Then came our final day - the final ever - in school, after which we would never be alowed to step into it as students. As fate would have it, our class got jinxed dat day for various reasons - our final assembly programme could never be presented. Yet, we enjoyed viewing it as a class - together for one final time.
Again, there were more more hugs, more pics and more tears. Ah!!!!!!! how I wish I could relive those 12 years again and again and over again. How I wish for a "time turner"(HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF ASKABAN)!!!!!!!

Now, sitting at home, with no expectations of meeting my friends again in school, I feel cut off, chopped from the world I belong to. The truth is yet to dawn upon us that our school is not the world but a part of the world. Sometimes, I feel it is better if that truth dawns upon us. Sometimes, I feel  it is beter if it doesn't.
All that awaits us now are the board exams and that endless wait of hope and expectations until the results are out. And then, take a plunge into the a sea  of new people with a "school" of old fishes and explore the new world with enthusiasm...................

"..........If winter comes,
Can spring be far behind?"          - P.B. SHELLEY

OF WAR – Once Upon a Time……

Sitting on a stone was an old man.

He had an unearthly look.

For his left leg he had a stub

For his left hand – a hook.

Walking down the road, I was amused by his sight.

I felt an urge to talk.

“Sir, how is it that you have only two limbs?

Will you be able to walk?”

His right hand he placed upon my head

Over me, he cast a spell.

His piercing look bore into me.

His tale he began to tell

“It is the story of revenge –

The tale I will tell you now.

It is the story of treason and hate

With a little shade of love.

Once there lived an able king –

Courageous and just was he.

He had a daughter – the heir of the kingdom –

Who was admired and loved by me”

I asked him “How did she look? Was she beautiful? Why did you admire her?”

“The princess was charming.

Had an enchanting smile did she.

She was beauty in human form,

As beautiful as beauty could be.

She was generous; She was kind

She was character personified

She was the owner of a magical voice

She was our kingdom’s pride.

I served the king, his General I was.

I was his comrade; He was never a boss.

Many a war we fought together, many a war we won.

Once I did save him from death

From then we became one.

One fine day, I asked the king

If I could marry his daughter.

For a moment he stood still.

Then, he burst into laughter.

‘Who are you?’ the king asked

‘to ask my daughter in marriage?

You are after all, my General.

I want a prince with lineage’”

The old man continued “This insult I could not bear. The king had hot me where it hurt most. I decided to take revenge and make the king pay for his words. His most trusted General was to become his enemy, for the king had destroyed the love I carried for his daughter”

He continued:

“Then came a war – a fierce war.

What a huge army our’s was!

The king was away fighting the enemy king.

Of the army, I was the boss.

On sending the troops to fight the enemy,

To assist the king I went.

‘Oh! What a chance!’ I thought

‘A chance fate has sent’

In order to fight the enemy king,

I went and joined my boss.

When the chance presented itself,

I slew my Master’s horse.

Our king fell down. I thrust my sword

Through his mighty heart.

He swung around and with his sword,

Chopped my two limbs apart.

The war was lost, but not the kingdom –

It was gifted by the enemy king.

I was the king, I ran to the princess

But I could not hear her sing.

The princess had died, the people – enraged!

They knew of my deed.

They pelted stones, they hit me

Till I could no longer bleed

They carried me atop a hill.

They nailed me to a tree.

With the tree, I was burnt,

But my soul was not to be free.

My story ends here” he said.

“Oh! Let him not be a spirit” I wished

“Who are you, then?” I asked aloud.

Right before my eyes, he vanished!!!

IN AN "EGG"SHELL(not nutshell as the phrase goes)

This post is not to discuss anything serious. They are just two anecdotes.

 It so happened that I returned home from school to find my brother a little excited. "A pigeon has made a nest on our bathroom window sill and has laid an egg". He has an inclination for nature and that sort of things. There was no doubt he was excited. He derived great thrill in watching the bird everyday as it sat incubating the egg. No doubt we had to bang the bathroom door several times when he went to bathe those few days!!
Even I slightly caught up with his enthusiasm and was seen climbing onto the chair to watch the egg - I am shorter than him; so what? Even Tendulkar is short -
 My brother recently joined a gym(nasium). He wants to gain weight and develop stamina and fitness!! He doesn't have a body that can be boasted about - nor do I. The gym trainers initially made fun of him he says "admiring" his body. Even the other people who come to the gym chuckled when they saw him, he says. And that made my brother extremely determined to develop a body and gain weight. He heard them say that eating eggs will help build a body. And that trigerred off a series of events which i enjoyed receding to the backdrop of all the drama:
   Soon after coming home he told our mother that he wanted to eat eggs. We are a strictly vegetarian family. Infact, eating eggs was something we could not imagine(though many had eaten once upon a time). He called one of our cousins who was his "senior" and asked him how he ate the egg. Let us not go into what he told and what my brother asked again. That was it. He told how he had eaten the egg.
  Then my brother called up another senior in the family - senior in age this time - who said something not very encouraging about eating eggs. He - the senior -  too is an activist for vegetarianism. And my brother was caught between to opposite currents - to eat an egg or not. And in that cross-fire in the mind, I don't think he had his meal properly that day(meal of rice) - I don't exactly recollect.
  And today, the egg is no longer on the window sill of our bathroom(my brother has no hand in it - I swear). Maybe, a cat or something ate it. Maybe, it fell down. Maybe, it was shifted to a place where it is safer. I hope it is the third.
  And today, my brother is yet to taste an egg - an omlette or whatever the dish is made of the egg. Maybe, he will never eat an egg. Maybe, he will eat it in secrecy. Maybe, he will eat it in public. I hope it is the third.
 This is my brother - in an "egg"shell.

IN PURSUIT OF FOOLS - based on a folk tale

Once upon atime in England
There lived a Jack and Rose.
Such fools were they that on them
The sun of sense never rose.

They had a daughter Molly
Who was engaged to a Jack
Fool Molly was of the nth order
Luckily, sense prevailed on Jack

'Twas Christmas Eve - they
Invited Jack to dine
It was after a great feast that
Molly went to fetch wine.

To the cellar Molly went
To fill the jug with ale.
In the ceiling was an axe!!!
Our dear Molly went pale

Sat crying did Molly
Into the future her thoughts ran
She forgot to close the barrel
On the floor, ale ran

Into the cellar ran Jack and John and Rose
Shuddering and crying, our poor Molly rose
Asked Jack: "Why do you cry Molly dear?"
Holding back her tears, Molly expresed her fear:

"Oh dear Jack, soon we will marry
Our name will our dear child carry
One day like me, he will come to fetch wine.
What if this axe falls on the son of mine?"

Saying so, Molly burst into tears
John and Rose followed suit.
"How irrational are your fears!!!"-
Jack marched away stamping his foot!

Coming out of the cellar, Jack made an oath- "On Christmas Eve, On Christ I swear, I won't marry Molly until i find three people more foolish than you three!!"

On horseback left Jack on pursuit-
A pursuit for fools it was
A sight made him stop dead
Oh! What a sight it was!!

Pushing a cow onto a ladder
There was a plump man!!
Amazed at this curious sight,
To him Jack ran:

"Pushing a cow onto a  ladder!
What mean you to do sir?"
"Oh! There is chaff on the roof.
I have nobody to get it to her"

Flabbergasted at this reply,
Jack left the man alone
"He is the first fool" he thought
"Two more before  I go home"

Through a village travelling was Jack
Right in the dead of the night.
People were running helter-skelter
It gave him such a fright!!!

Of all the people running,
Jack stopped one:
"Brother, what has happened?
Why do you all run?"

"Don't you know?" asked the man
His tone was filled with misery
"The moon has fallen into the lake-
We do better hurry"


This was too much for Jack to digest. He told himself: I have found not just three but a village full of fools. My Molly and her parents are far better". Jack returned home, married Molly and lived happily ever after!